In the ever-evolving landscape of comics, there are simply some things that should not have happened. In Retcon This!, we examine some of the more questionable aspects of our beloved characters’ sordid histories.

Oh Arcee, what has time wrought up on thee?

Oh right, fetish fan art. *head2desk*

Not actually the first female transformer to be featured in the Generation 1 cartoon series she was introduced and heavily featured in the big screen 1985 Transformers: The Movie.

Rodimus "I'm Helping" Prime and Arcee as per their appearances in the TF Movie.

FUNFACT: Unicron the Transformers Movie Universe’s version of Satan a giant planet eating transformer, voiced by Orson Welles in his final role, could only be hurt by a handful of Transformers which included not only the Dinobots but Arcee.

Now that we’re up to speed on her background as basically being the eye candy of the Movie and Generation 2 cartoons, Arcee has had many crimes against her personage in both the various continuities AND the toys, but being a toy geek I’m just gonna cover the various Toy transgressions. First up is the fact Arcee didn’t get ANY transformable toy love back in the days of her first appearance.

That is some bullsh*t. Seriously, f*ck you Takara/Hasbro.

Look at that. Seriously, look at that piddly piece of plastic. Heroes of Cybertron, honestly? These pvc abominations had limited articulation and interchangeable parts but featured NO TRANSFORMABILITY WHATSOEVER! I should be happy that they at least gave her a toy, in spite of its lack of “Space Car-iness” and even repainted it green and white to be some non-descript army builder “Paradon Medic” random female transformer. (Repaints are something Arcee molds became synonymous with.)

Arcee, Arcee everywhere and not a-one is a GD SPACE CAR!

Transformers Energon Arcee, as you can see above, is not a fancy Space Car as seen in the Transformers Movie. She is some funky motorbike. It was repainted an additional 2 times as Target Exclusives for the Transformers Live action movie.

ARCEE IS NEVER BLUE! NEVER! *tears*

Next up, Arcee fans were punished, yes yes punished in the fact that Arcee was given a “Botcon” exclusive which is a repaint of the Transformers Beast Machines Blackarachnia figure.

Not bad, kinda sexy... maybe?

But you must remember that being a Botcon Exclusive there is only a really really limited amount of these… horrible horrible nightmare fuel mechanical spiders.

WTF IS THAT?!?!

Now I’m sure I’m glossing over some random pvc appearances here and there but now we’re back to the Michael Bay Transformers live-action movies. In the first Transformers film we were promised this:

Not bad, not good either but hey... its still not a space car.

And what we got was this:

That is motorbike in the Transformers Movie that is definitely NOT Arcee.

This was quite rectified in the next live action flick by us being promised this:

Thats sexy good times... somehow.

And wow, they actually all appeared in the movie. Up above you see Arcee, Chromia, and Flareup/Moonracer/Elita-One/Random Female Transformer; which are described as “Arcee and the Twins” which just titillates me to no end.

BACK: TF Movie 1 Arcee, MIDDLE: Chromia in blue, FRONT: pink TF Movie 2 Arcee.

Oddly enough in the second film the two dead or injured of the Arcee triumvirate from the final battle were only ones to score toys… so far.

And last but not least, we have the most recent cartoon endeavor Transformers Animated. It featured Arcee in couple of episodes and oddly enough scored us our first… well take a look at this:

SPACE CAR! SPACE CAR! SPACE CAR!

And the tragedy here: She’s promised to be released by Hasbro sometime by Christmas 2009. Oddly enough the Transformers Animated toyline is indeed cancelled but they insisted at this year’s Botcon that we’d see her mixed in with the Transformers Universe Classics figures.

We can only hope…

*drools*

***

As an addendum I’d like to steer this article and its somewhat silly nature back to the actual point of the much needed retcon. While Cheetara, Teela, and other “token” female characters of male dominated ensemble casts were given their proper dues in toy form Arcee was short shifted. Sure the Autobots and Decepticons provided a sprawling cast of dozens of individual bots across the seasons but for being the female lead of its feature film debut she was largely ignored as Transformers was a combination of two purportedly male centric genres Science Fiction and Robots.

Ass kicking female leads? You betcha.

I say thee nay! Back in 1977 we had the glory that is Princess Leia grace the silver screen where she was a hard charging heroine in Star Wars, and Ms. Fisher’s bun-haired gun totin’ diplomatic spy had oodles of figures from her appearance. Eight years later and no dice for the fleet footed and crackshot Arcee.

So this leaves me to say Hasbro - Takara, Retcon This!